Quarterlife Crisis

I've started a book called Conquering Your Quarterlife Crisis by Alexandra Robbins. She is my new favorite author and you can see more of her writings at www.alexandrarobbins.com.

So, the introduction states 6 indicators that one is going through a quarterlife crisis, defined as a response to the transition from young adulthood to adulthood where one is plagued by intense identity issues resulting in a range of reactions from self-doubt to serious bouts of depression, with the nagging question of "Is this all there is?"

The indicators of the quarterlife crisis are:
1. You don't know what you want.
2. Your 20s aren't what you expected.
3. You have a fear of failure.
4. You can't let go of childhood.
5. You waffle over decisions.
6. You constantly compare (yourself to peers and feel you come up short).

So, I'm guessing the fact that I struggle with all except #4 means that I'm in a quarterlife crisis. #5 & #6 are particularly evident in my life, and those who know me even halfway well aren't surprised to hear this.

Some questions the book tackles (the parentheses are my commentary):
--What if I don't know what I want? (The eternal question.)
--When do I let go of my dream? (After I answer question #1.)
--How do I know if I'm dating The One? (I love that she capitalizes it.)
--Why am I having trouble meeting people? (Seriously.)
--How do I weigh doing something I love vs. making money? (A girl's gotta eat.)
--What if I want to completely change direction in my career? (Oy, the time...the money...)
--Why is it so hard to live alone? (As great as Wilbert is, conversation tends to lag, and I'm getting more selfish by the hour.)
--How do I stop comparing myself to other people? (Another wedding, another baby shower, another housewarming...)
--When will I stop feeling afraid and start looking forward to growing older? (30 is approximately 1 year, 6 months, 1 week, and 23 hours away...approximately.)

I don't mean to make everyone wonder if I'm depressed. I'm not. I actually am quite okay with life right now, probably b/c I realize that my questions are normal. But I do ask these types of questions. So, I'm pretty excited about the rest of this book. I think God has some things to teach me. Anyone else in a quarterlife crisis?

Torrential Downpour...In My Car

It's been awhile since I've shared a good Wilbert story...well, this is only quasi-Wilbert, but he is in it, so...

I got back from Oklahoma last weekend at about 1:00 a.m. I unloaded my car in the drizzling rain and fell into bed. Torrential rain fell all night and the storms kept waking me up. The next morning a little before noon (11 hours later for you math geniuses), I went to my car so I could make the trip to Fort Worth to pick up Wilbert.

I walked toward my car and could not believe my eyes. My driver's side door was open. No, folks. Not the window. The DOOR.

I wondered if someone had tried to steal the car and had been unsuccessful. Since I have moved to Denton, I have received several notes from the apartment management about assaults and car theft (not to mention my laundry theft incident, which they did NOT report to the rest of the apartment community--I was miffed). So you can imagine my thoughts as I approached my car.

I'm not altogether sure, but I think this is what happened: 1) I went around to the passenger side to finish unloading the car. 2) I took the trash to the nearby dumpster. 3) I did NOT return to the driver's side to close the door.

Like I said, there were torrential downpours the entire night. My car was soaked. It now smells absolutely disgusting. I don't think Wilbert was very happy when I picked him up. He crinkled his nose and buried his face. Poor Wilbert. Here's my bone to pick: Little boys steal my laundry. But, when I leave my car door wide open, not one thing is missing from my car. Are you kidding me?

In other news...

Those of you who have known me for any amount of time know that I have had this awful nail biting habit since the womb.

I hope I'm not jinxing myself, but I think I have broken the 28 year old habit. I have had triumphant moments before where I thought I conquered this issue...only to find that "The Bourne Identity" or some nerve-wracking event destroyed me.

However, this time, I believe I have won. I have gorgeous nails that are all mine. This may be a little gross for those of you who have issues with touching your eyes, but the major sign of my victory is that my nails are long enough that I now have to slide my contacts out instead of simply pulling them. A strange way to measure success, granted...but it works!

The Greenwood-Miller Wedding

This weekend, I had the privilege of being a bridesmaid in Robin's wedding in Norman, OK. Here are some highlights:

For all you Project Runway fans out there, you will recognize Kayne in this picture. Kayne's business is in Norman, and he designed our bridemaid dresses (which you'll see in the pictures to follow).


This picture is a bit tangential from the wedding, but this is Sally, Heather's dog. Sally's tongue is too long to fit in her mouth so it constantly hangs out like this. Hands down, one of the funniest things I've ever seen.


Here's Kayne's dress...and me & Robin before the wedding.


For the 3rd time in a month, I've gotten to reunite with my West Africa friends. Here are Bill & Shirley Nolte, who served as the guesthouse coordinators on my team in Mali. (Yes, I borrowed a tux coat to stay warm in the below-strapless-dress weather we had.)


This is what the ladies do before the wedding!


I love this part...so classy!


Saying goodbye to Mr. & Mrs. Joel Miller...and when I say goodbye, I mean goodbye. Joel has a job out in California, so Robin is no longer a 2 hour drive away. :(


And for those who are curious about the bouquet toss, my least favorite part of the entire wedding process where it is tradition to make the single women feel very single and provoke a catfight, I will tell you that NONE of the women went for the bouquet. It landed squarely at my feet, so the consensus was that I "caught" the bouquet. I disagree. The photographer took a picture of the ladies' feet with the bouquet on the ground.

And finally, I could not have a post from Oklahoma without mocking the state in some way. Soooooo...what message is this combo automotive/liquor store in Chickasha, Oklahoma trying to convey? Drink & Drive?

Lately, I have been told that I am...

These aren't all exactly positive, but I thought it was interesting to mull over the impression I've left with various people lately:

fantastic
lovely
hilarious
too much (whatever that means)
punctual
a great friend
emotional
too romantic
a little wierd
talented
smart
quick (as in quick-witted...not so much with the running skills)
tall
not too tall (same person as "tall"...they were backpedaling)
a great conversationalist (I prefer the term "conversational wizard"; however, that wasn't the term used)
too organized
open
realistic
a little unrealistic
soft-hearted

So, what do you say?

I also found this pic of me and Aama from last Thanksgiving...it's my favorite pic of us ever. I love this woman.

the last couple of weeks...

West Africa Reunion--Tim & Kate visited DFW before going back to Senegal, so the Whipples (our neighbors in Senegal) and Jenn (another journeyman in Senegal) all had a reunion. Here we are...back row: Tim, Kate, Karley (littlest Whipple), Jenn, Denise; front row: Me, Dakotah (middle Whipple) & Noah (oldest Whipple); Not pictured: Seth, who is taking the picture


Me & Kate--3 years & 18 days after I left Africa, Kate and I were reunited. We were roommates and teammates in Senegal, working on the media team. Kate is about to go back to Senegal with her husband, Tim, to do discipleship ministry with Lebou believers.

The Dallas Mavericks, the 2006 NBA Western Division Champs, had their Pre-season Spring Training here at UNT last week. To thank the school, the Mavs had a scrimmage on Friday that was free for all current UNT faculty, staff, and students. Here are some pics:




Harris and one of the rookies, whose real name is JJ but he's from Puerto Rico so we started calling him "Rico"...when I say "we," I mean me & my friend, Jordan...10 minutes later, the other side of the crowd started cheering for Rico. So when he is called Rico next season, keep in mind that Jordan & I started that.


Diop, the Senegalese Maverick, taking a shot (really annoying--they pronounce it so it rhymes with "shop" when the correct Wolof should be pronounced to rhyme with "rope)


Dampier (25) & Terry (31)--Honestly, I have a crush on Jason Terry :)


Towards the end of the scrimmage, Terry tried to get the crowd going by running around with his shoe off, acting like he would throw it into the crowd. Obviously, this caused mayhem. At the end, Terry and Nowitski actually did throw their shoes into the crowd. I didn't get one. :(

I had a special treat today. :) Tiffany was a fellow journeyman in West Africa. She lived in a hut in Burkina Faso for 2 years, ministering to the Marense people. Tiff is one awesome girl. She's living in Mississippi now, but was in Dallas for a conference. I love living here--I'm seeing old friends I wouldn't have seen if I was still in Corpus. :)

Tiffany & Me

disappointment, hope and worship

I was disappointed this week. The cure for disappointment is hope in the eternal Father, Son and Spirit, for "hope does not disappoint because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us." Hope is manifested in worship.

"Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." -- Romans 15:13

Hope is manifested in worship.

Worship in song. Finding new harmonies. Praise.

Worship in nature. The sun breaking through a cloud formation.

Worship in written expression. Telling a story. Telling His story.

Worship in community. Authentic sharing of life.

Worship in missional living. Sharing Him with a co-worker.

Worship in service. Showing nursery babies love.

Worship in Scripture meditation. Allowing Truth to abide in me.

Worship in prayer. Coming near to the throne of grace.

My hope in Him has been manifested in these offerings of worship this week.

Another list...but some pictures too :)

Due to the fact that I have no appointments today (are you kidding me? What is THAT about?), I decided to post about the non-stop weekend I just had. Also, at the request of someone (who will remain nameless) who likes my lists (or just likes mocking them), I will process the weekend in traditional Pegs form. I wasn't so swift at coming up with a list on the fly, so hopefully the time processed will produce a quality list. :) So, here's the latest list...as usual, in no particular order:

10. The waiter who thought he could sing but in fact could NOT...and the blessed birthday girl who also thought he could sing so she had him sing to her TWICE
9. Seeing one of my fellow bridesmaids in "Oliver" at the Sooner Community Theatre--Heather was excellent!
8. Being treated to dinner at someone's favorite restaurant--there's nothing that makes you feel special like being taken to a favorite (and Avocado Enchiladas-yum!)
7. Embarrassing the mess out of Robin at her "personal shower" :) Really, though, let's call a spade a spade-it was a lingerie shower
6. Feeling incredibly loved-I think I had about 20 voicemails on my phone over 2 days, and used about 1000 minutes--thank goodness for unlimited weekends!
5. Meeting people I've heard about for 5 years--Jenny & Jacob totally surpassed all expectations
4. Going to IHOP in the middle of the night--really, is there anything better?
3. Seeing (and definitely hearing) a girl run smack into a glass door at a really nice hotel--classic
2. Gas for $2.03--the best thing I've found in Oklahoma to date!
1. Living life--taking chances, meeting new people, and accepting God's blessings as they come!


The Bridesmaids (sans Rachel): Me, Heather, Robin (the bride) and Jenny (the MOH)


Congrats to Robin & Joel (excuse the glare, the front door was open)


Me & Robin


Jenny & Robin at the "personal shower"--Let the humiliation begin! :)

What I Love about North Texas...3 months later

Back on June 2nd, I wrote a top ten about what I love about Denton. I had lived here for about 2 weeks. Now that it's been about 3.5 months, I would like to slightly revise my list...I expanded it from Denton to North Texas, and you'll see why. In no particular order, except it came to my head:

10. The Village Church--I found a place to belong!
9. My home group from the church--lovely ladies
8. La Madeleine (still makes the list, best restaurant)
7. Location, location, location (All my bridesmaidly duties for Robin's wedding in Oklahoma are within a 2 hour drive instead of a 3 hour flight! Also a weekend trip to Austin to see Josh & Amy is totally do-able.)
6. The Greenhouse Restaurant (ah...love those sweet potato fries)
5. The Square (see my post from late July called A Little Piece of Home)
4. My office--has been painted and new artwork hung...I LOVE how it turned out. We call it "The Mocha Coffee Shop" b/c of the colors and the atmosphere I created (pics are forthcoming)
3. Recycled Books--wonderful old bookstore on the Square
2. The feeling of being far from home...but not really :)
1. It's exactly where I'm supposed to be.

Stolen laundry and Victoria's Secret

Two weekends ago (I'm running behind), I spent a lovely Saturday evening on a date with a fabulous man...just kidding. I spent the evening doing 2 very full loads of laundry. When I went to get them out of the dryer at the exact time they should have been finished, I found the dryers empty! Someone stole my laundry! (But kindly left my empty laundry basket.) Are you KIDDING me? First of all...gross. Second of all...I'm not one to talk, doing laundry on a Saturday night, but really...get a life.

My theory is as follows...when I had gone to change the loads from the washers to the dryers, there were these 2 little boys in there--about 8 & 10--just the right age to think stealing someone's laundry would be hilarious. Hmph. My theory is that those two kids stole it. For what reason, other than pure entertainment, I do not know.

Well, without getting TMI on you, I'll just say that pretty much every pair of undies I own was in one of those loads. Thus, a trip to Victoria's Secret was necessary the next day.

Those of you who know me well know that Vic's is not my favorite place, usually because you can find very uncomfortable men hanging out along the walls trying to be inconspicuous while their wives/girlfriends/sisters search the store. Have you ever noticed they usually put a "man's store" next to Vic's? For example, in Denton, Radioshack is within visual distance. My other theory from this weekend is that if the man isn't in the store specifically to buy something for that wonderful woman in his life, he needs to go to Radioshack.

Because, searching the piles of undies for my size and style whilst a man is standing against the wall two feet away (or maybe one foot) was the most awkward thing I've done in awhile. I almost asked the man, "Are you sure you don't need something from Radioshack?"

In fact, it only fueled my fire to be more ticked off that my laundry was stolen in the first place.

Keep Austin Wierd

I learned this ATX phrase when I visited the capital of Texas last weekend. Josh & Amy just moved there to start Josh's MBA program at UT. My prior experience with Austin involved getting there late evening, staying at a friend's house, and leaving early morning for Dallas. Due to this, my experience with Austin was limited to I35's INSANE traffic jams, causing great distaste, dislike, and disdain for all things Austin. However, contrary to my opinion, Austin proved to be a unique, fun and crazy place that I actually really enjoyed. So, my opinion has been revised and my new advice is to visit Austin if at all possible. :) Here are some highlights:


If you go to the Hula Hut and decide to order the "Tubular Taco" you might consider sharing it with someone


I found this hottie at the Hula Hut, a must-do restaurant in Austin


Out of the goodness of my heart, I decided to share Mr. Statue with Ames (shh...don't tell Josh)


Pegs & Ames at UT


Friends from high school who also happen to live in Austin


Pegs & Brooklyn, Tara's daughter


The Capitol Building


Ames & Pegs get their pose on before salsa dancing

A little piece of home...

Christine came to visit this week! We had a great time catching up, and I got to show her around Denton a bit. Here are some highlights:


Christine & Wilbert are reunited after months apart...this is Wilbert's favorite napping position. Seriously, he'll just stay like that. He's a wierd dog. Upon closer inspection, he looks bat-like...but I can't get Blogger to upload that photo so you'll have to use your imagination.


If you come to Denton, I'll take you to "The Square." It's downtown and sooooo cute, with fun little eateries and quaint shops. They turn on twinkle lights at night and it's beautiful. So, after eating dinner at The Greenhouse (my favorite restaurant in Denton...again, if you visit, I'll take you and even treat--so you should come visit), Christine & I played on the Square.


First stop on the square--Jammin' Jeans. This place sells name brands for REALLY cheap. This Guess skirt was $10. I will be going back. Note the price tag on the skirt...after thinking about stealing it, I decided I could afford the $10 so I bagged my jeans (you know, since it's 106 degrees outside) and wore it out. I love wearing new clothes out of the store.


We found this great used bookstore. They buy and sell old books, cds, videos, record albums, dvds, whatever. I have no idea what the name of it is, because it was located in a purple building that said Opry House on the outside. Fabulous.


Christine & I paint the town...and I need to learn new slang


Beth Marie's, the best ice cream in Denton

Aama

Before I go further, let me say that I will post grad pics soon! My internet at home has been down, so I haven't had a chance...but I will soon!

I've called my grandmother "Aama" since somewhere around high school. I've never heard the word used anywhere else...until Saturday. I was browsing the Cultural Studies section at Barnes & Noble (where else would I be my first Saturday sans grad school?) and came upon a title, "Aama in America." Of course, I had to pull it off the shelf. As it turns out, "Aama" means mother in Nepali.

I LOVE the fact that I discovered this. For 14 years, my grandmother has been my mother. When my own mother became too sick to be mother, my grandmother assumed the role quietly and perfectly.

My mother is the reason I'm alive. For obvious reasons and for not so obvious reasons. Most people don't know it, but she wasn't supposed to be able to have children because of her kidney issues. So when she became pregnant, everyone except her and my grandmother thought she should have an abortion. She refused, and here I am. My mother supported me without fail and was my biggest fan and biggest warrior. She gave everything she had and wanted to give more.

She died nearly 9 years ago now. It seems so unnatural. I can't remember her voice or her smell, and often actually have to look at pictures to try to REALLY remember what she looked like. She became sick 14 years ago, when I was 14 years old. Most of the time it's okay that she's gone. I know she was in a lot of pain, mentally, emotionally and physically. She needed to go. But I have endured high school, college and young adult life now...virtually alone. Times when a mother is the only person who can comfort or fill the void or make it all better. Times when she would have said I was beautiful, when clearly, I was not. And there will be more times when she "should" be here. Times like graduating with a Masters degree. Times like if/when I get engaged and need to plan a wedding or pick out a wedding dress. Times when I'm pregnant and have kids and have no idea what to do with them or myself. Times when my grandmother passes away and she should take care of everything. Those days will come. And I will face them without a mother. Thank God that He is a mother. I know we always talk about God as Father, but I believe He is mother to me as well.

The days it is hardest are the days that "Mom should be here". I just had one of those days last Friday. Even though she wasn't able to make the trip, Aama called me incessantly until she got to find out how everything went. Aama fights for me. She prays for me. She mothers me.

My Lopsided Man-Magnet

Recently, I came to realize that Wilbert's head is slightly lopsided. One of his floppy ears starts further on top of his head than the other (the right one, for the curious). Also, his nose goes off to the right. Doesn't matter, he's still dang cute.

So cute, that my little bug (that's what I call him, for those who haven't had the pleasure of hearing it first-hand...I say it in my "widdle biddy puppy" voice too) has been the source of not one, not two, but THREE conversations with some very nice-looking men in the apartment complex. While we did have one more brief run-in with Mr. Boxer-Briefs (no pun intended), Wilbert's usefulness greatly improved over the course of last week as these guys kept coming up to me, reminscing over wienie dogs from their past and introducing themselves.

I found out yesterday that Denton just opened a dog park. Well, I bet you know where I'm going to be headed regularly with Wilbert. For his benefit of exercise, mind you. It's all about Wilbert. Not about the likelihood of meeting fellow dog lovers who happen to be good-looking single men. Nope. It's all about Wilbert.

prayer for India

Just a note that I have added a link to the right to a prayer blog for my friends' ministry in India. They have asked for security reasons not to connect them to the site, but the site is updated daily with prayer requests for their ministry.

A whole 'nother level of "Oh no, you just didn't."

I just got back from walking Wilbert...seriously, did I have a boring life before having a dog to walk? I don't recall it being boring, but all my adventures seem to be stemming from dog walks lately.

This time, we were walking and oh.my.word.

We walked past the laundry room and this man comes out. I'm guessing he was late 40s-early 50s. And he walked out...in his boxer-briefs.

That's it.

He smiled at me (EWWWWW) and then walked away. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Seriously.

Soaked to the gills...

So, every morning (weekdays, at least) this is the routine. My alarm goes off at 6:30 a.m. and I'm usually woken out of a vivid dream. For some reason, I have clear dreams that I almost always remember...but I digress.

When I finally am able to realize it's the alarm and time to get up, I turn it off and slowly crawl out of bed. The first 5 minutes of waking up is, I'm convinced, more painful than even childbirth. I'll probably have a different opinion on that later in life...but again, I digress.

I put on my glasses, so I have a clue what's going on, and then Wilbert and I go for his morning walk. I've discovered that if I don't take him immediately, he will let me know that was a major mistake and I end up being side-tracked from my routine for the next 15 minutes...look what I did, I digressed again.

This morning, everything was going according to the plan. We were out on our walk, and of course, neither of us is functioning very well just yet (it takes me a good hour). As we walked, I heard a hissing sound...but my brain and my body just couldn't get it together, and the hissing sound became the lawn sprinklers going up all over the complex. There was NOWHERE dry to go!

So Wilbert starts getting really agitated and takes off, dragging me around the complex. Finally, the sprinklers shut off and we walked back to the apartment. I am so glad I didn't take the time to Chi my hair last night, or I'd be really ticked off. As it is, I have nice, curly hair for work and Wilbert was blown dry so he wouldn't be cold.

May your Hump Day go just as swimmingly.

Highlights from the weekend

Wilbert checking things out on the drive


Trees at Holly Lake Ranch in East Texas


Nathan & me--Ben & Kara's (friends from high school) newborn


Fireworks with the Bells--me & Caryn


Ardin & I enjoy cupcakes at the fireworks


Can you tell the canoe is landed on a dock?

Chrissy & The Bean Counter

One of my Corpus friends, Chrissy, is an incredible singer/songwriter. She's traveling around Texas getting her music out and she is always very well-received when she plays. Her lyrics are just amazing. See the "Chrissy's Music" link to the right if you'd like to hear samples or see her upcoming dates.
Last weekend, I went to Abilene, TX, with Chrissy where she sang at a coffee shop called "The Bean Counter." Good times!

You know you're traveling in Oklahoma when...

I just spent approximately 11 hours driving in Oklahoma this past weekend. Just as when I traveled in Texas, Oklahoma had its own distinct brand of traveling tales so you knew exactly where you were.

1. You pay $3.50 to drive on the interstate...not a turnpike, the plain old interstate. (No, we had no cash...we had debit cards. Refer to my "Where's your debit card, lady?" post from earlier in June.)Who has tolls on interstates?
2. You drive and drive for hours according to the Yahoo directions. Then, you think you might have made a wrong turn so you stop at Dairy Queen and ask a shady looking guy in cutoffs what his thoughts are on your situation. After looking you up & down, and finding out your final destination, he says, "Why the hell are you going this way?" Thank you, sir, for your help.
3. You tune in only country...unlike Texas, you don't even have the option of Tejano. It's just country.
4. People are mean. Customer service is non-existent. What's with these Okies?
5. Everyone stares at you for using a cell phone. Seriously, same Dairy Queen as the directions guy...have they never seen one?
6. You ask for the next big town and they tell you "Okmulgee." Is that Oklahoma-nese or what? Turns out Okmulgee WAS big...it had Dairy Queen AND Taco Bell. Score.

Episode Two: 1992--The One with the Quiz

If you are just now joining us and need to read Episode One or if you just need a re-cap, see post on June 12th.

My mother and I lived in a small Texas town during my eighth grade year. Not one to be overly gregarious, I found two best friends and rarely spoke to anyone else, especially anyone of the male species. However, I admiringly looked at a certain boy throughout that year, again in history class. He was another blond with just the right blend of skinny and smart, not overly popular, but friendly enough.

For some reason, from the ripe age of thirteen, I was only interested in the opposite sex in a very permanent way. I imagined a serious relationship with all the romantic moments I could conjure up, including the perfect proposal. The wedding would come shortly after, and I wasted no time scrawling “Peggy (Insert boy’s last name here)” all over any hard surface I could find.

However, my imagination would never take the risk of speaking out loud and the boy in question never knew of our wedding. For all I know, he never even knew of me, except that I was the new girl who didn’t know what county she lived in on the first day of school. We had moved the night before school started, and on the first day my teacher gave a quiz that she thought to be a guaranteed perfect score to start us off on the right foot.

Lesson: Know what county you live in.