It finally happened. Peggy's not hungry.
In 2004, I went on a bit of an anorexic streak. But for the last 5 years, I have been a solid eater. So solid that I eat when I'm not hungry. One of those boredom eaters. Also, a midnight snacker. It's not a binge thing. I eat a 90 calorie granola bar in the middle of the night. Or maybe a string cheese. But for some reason, when I get up to pee, I feel a compulsive urge to go grab a little somethin-somethin.
Then came Monday. On Monday, I ate a Hawaiian bagel w/cream cheese for breakfast. Then a chicken teriyaki bowl for lunch. Pretty normal. THEN.
A massive headache hit around 3pm, but I forced myself to go to class. At about 6:30, I thought I was going to pass out. Or puke. Or both. 20 minutes later, class ended and I drove home.
Rewind: a typical evening food-wise for me is to eat dinner. Then eat a snack. Then eat dessert. Then another little snack. Then bed. Then the midnight snack. (You can see how I gained back 20 pounds since 2004). Mind you, they were usually the light options I mentioned earlier...but lots of low cal stuff still adds up to high cal.
I felt incomplete if I didn't eat my little ritual. It would bug me and bug me until I grabbed that snack.
Back to the present: so on Monday I arrive home and despite the nausea and headache, start my ritual. I microwaved a Lean Cuisine frozen pizza. I ate about half of it over 2.5 hours. Then threw it away. Then went to bed.
Now it's Thursday. For 3 days, I have eaten like a bird. Peggy doesn't eat like a bird. Peggy eats like an hombre.
I feel fine. No more headache, no more nausea since Monday night. But also, no appetite.
I stepped on the scale today. 3.5 pounds down in a week.
I'm sure I will talk to my therapist about this on Tuesday.
Oh yeah, I see a therapist.
Personal Wellness at the conference
5 days ago
8 comments:
If it helps at all - my appetite TOTALLY goes in swings.
If I don't feel well at some point (like your headache, etc.) it often takes a week or more for my normal appetite to come back. And...I honestly think it's a monthly rhythm (if you know what I mean) that some days I could eat non-stop and other days I'm just not that hungry. Seems to be a pretty normal/healthy cycle.
But I also imagine talking to your therapist will be helpful :)
Yikes. That sounds a bit scary... and also sad, considering how much I love eating. It would be a huge loss in my life if I no longer enjoyed it!
So happy you're sharing this with the blogosphere (and a therapist, 'cause they probably know more about causes/ helping than we do!).
Take care of yourself, Nabu.
hmm. intriguing. p.s. my therapist and i are like...bff. well, technically not actually best friends, but you know what i mean.
Does this loss of appetite have to do with a big change in your life, by chance?
ack.
I'm an emotional/comfort eater and I notice I eat more when I'm super stressed out. But for some, they eat less because their body just needs, craves, rest.
up until recently my eating habits were like kate's...sometimes birdlike, sometimes i ate like a field-hand. and like you, i tend to eat due to habit. regardless of if i am hungry or not i always ate dessert at night. i'm a big fan of routine.
now i have NO desire to eat anything and i hate all food but canned pineapple. it's beyond disturbing and sad. i miss food.
also, 3.5 lbs in one week? HOLY COW. and i miss my therapist...sometimes i want to email her just because i miss talking to her. but that doesn't seem healthy.
I have your nighttime eating and eating when you get up in the night habit, too!!!
Well...glad you feel better.
the last comment you just left on my blog? i laughed so hard i tooted.
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