So, I'm frustrated with the blog.
I used to treat the blog as an open space where Pegs could shine.
Now, I feel like I have to temper each blog post. I have to make it appropriate for the public sphere (not that a million people read it, but you know what I mean).
And that leaves me feeling like the blog is not honest anymore. It is so censored that the real me isn't known.
Most people who know me beyond acquaintance level know that I am nothing if not honest. I am an open book. I meet you once and I'll tell you what my struggles are and who my crush is. (This has backfired on more than one occasion, and for awhile it was hard to open up to people, but I think I've more or less recovered.)
So, I wonder if I should keep the blog anymore. Because really, if all I can share with you is that I'm taking 3 classes (which I do like immensely so far), work part-time for the IAL program (which I also like immensely), and go to a church and community group with some great people...well, I'm just not sure the blog should continue.
I want to be real. But, is the blog the place for that?
If I wrote about the things that are forming me right now, I would share about:
--the restored relationship with my father that has been an answer to nearly 2 decades of prayer
--the dog I had to give up last week, a situation that left me simultaneously aching and at peace that God is already working His glorious ways through it
--my fear that the thing that I want (marriage and kids) is a pipe dream and I wonder everyday why in the world I'm pursuing a terminal degree towards a career that I can only feign passion about on most days
And that's what I'd actually blog about...if I could.
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11 comments:
why do you feel restrained? i love your blogs and hope you continue. i enjoy reading about the deep and shallower parts of your life.
If you want to, I think you should blog about these things. You can 'change the names' to protect the innocent and carefully share without betraying any confidences. It's a tough line to walk, but I think it's worth a try - especially since there are lots of us you appreciate your blog as a way of keeping up with what's (really) going on. That said, don't leave out the fluff - it's fun too! :)
peggy, of course kari beat me to commenting. i'm glad you decided to go ahead and share the last half there. thanks.
Sweet Pegs - you can blog in generalities. It's true that some things should not be shared with EVERYONE. But, still, you can blog about what specifically God is teaching you, and how you see him working in others' lives. And only blog the things about the guy that he wouldn't mind you sharing with the world. Love you and MISSED YOU IN AUSTIN!!!
I agree with everything said above. I've had reservations myself, but I think the creative and personal release is well worth it. Just be comfortable with your decision. *hug*
Hello. This post is likeable, and your blog is very interesting, congratulations :-). I will add in my blogroll =). If possible gives a last there on my site, it is about the CresceNet, I hope you enjoy. The address is http://www.provedorcrescenet.com . A hug.
well, lookee there - you are on someone's blogroll!
i'm glad that you opened up and shared your life...i struggle with the exact same things everytime i go to write on my blog. how much do i share? what if i offend? what if i come off proud/snotty/pathetic?
i think you should open up if you feel peace about it. you would probably be shocked by how many people can identify with you.
so glad, so thankful your decades old prayer has been answered.
Interesting thing...I was thinking the same thing today! I haven't had my blog up for two months and already I'm thinking I need to quit...I think I tend to hide behind the blog in an attempt to feel real and connected with others...but now I'm feeling as though I'm using it as an excuse to shy away from real life and authentic community. Well, whatever. The real reason I came to comment here was to see if you were up for some company this summer???
I would echo the sentiment of the comments - worth "walking the line" to stay connected with people who you can't sit down and talk with due to the distance between you. I never really knew you face to face, but I find reading about your life both fun and encouraging. So...I hope you keep blogging :)
I FULLY understand the censor! I feel like I have to do the same with mine. Plus, not all people *know* the depths of this potty mouth! Maybe we can take the plunge together…. I’m fixin’ to blog about some hard core issues and I need a bit of courage. All that to say – DO NOT QUIT THE BLOG!!!
Peggy, I love your blog and have
been keeping up with you for awhile
now. Your Uncle John gave me the
website ( or whatever you call it).
Unfortunately, I have lost his
e-mail address. Your mom and I
were best friends through high-school and beyond. I didn't go to Ray
HS, I went to King, but we were
friends through square dancing and
we were always hanging out together
at those dances. My dad was a
"square dance caller" and he had
a club, so we were there weekly -
dancing and having a good time
and if we weren't having a good
time, we were off somewhere talking. I just wanted you to
know that Laura would have been
so proud of you, which I'm sure
you know that. I enjoy it when
you talk about your family. I
was constantly at your mom's house
and we really had great times
together. I hope you keep going
with your blog - you are a little
part of your mom to me.
Sandy (Slough) Brown
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