In honor of the upcoming Valentine's Day, I thought I would blog about my Shy Bladder Syndrome (SBS). I was chatting with a couple of my friend-workers (co-workers who I count as friends) recently and realized I may have some weird issues around my SBS. This has particularly become an issue in the workplace, where I must use a 4-stall public restroom on a workdaily basis.
SBS-a working definition: when someone can't pee if someone else is around because there is a fear they will hear you and (gasp!) know what you're doing
SBS Coping Skills:
1. If I go into the bathroom and someone I know is in there, I pretend I just went in to wash my hands. I wash them and then sneak down one floor to the other bathroom where there is a far slighter chance of running into someone I know.
2. It infuriates me if I am in the far right stall (which I ALWAYS go to as a first choice) and the other 3 are empty and someone comes in and chooses the one next to me. I mean, I know there's a stall-wall, but come on...give me some space, please.
3. The toilets have auto-flushers that sometimes go off manically (read: flush for no apparent reason, often while you are still on the toilet). In order to pee, I will sometimes push the button so the toilet flushes, giving me a few precious seconds to push out the pee...but other people will assume it's just the psycho auto-flusher.
4. The hand dryer is an SBS person's best friend. When I am sitting there trying to pee and someone chooses to use the hand dryer over the paper towel machine, I want to hug them. That blessed hand dryer gives me a good minute to give my bladder the courage it needs to pee without fear of being heard.
SBS irony: By not being able to pee if you think someone else can hear you, you end up sitting there hoping to pee...meanwhile, others in there think you are pooping because it's taking you so long. Which in the mind of an SBS sufferer is far worse than if you had just peed in the first place.
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6 comments:
Is there any chance your SBS started as a result of trauma? Perhaps you were traveling to St Louis and your roomie walked with you waaaaay off the beaten path so you could pee in peace... and then a horsecart with two Puular guys rode by?
Perhaps. :)
Hilarious post...what does it have to do with Valentine's Day??? :)
i'm with kate, what in the WORLD does this have to do with valentine's day?!
also, this seems like an awfully traumatic event to suffer through on a daily basis. it must be exhausting!
I'd think those folks pretty much know what you're doing in the bathroom (peeing or pooping) and aren't at all surprised by this fact. Then again, I don't have SBS. Good luck!
Oh and by the way since we're posting our pee habits on the inet....earlier I had to pee so long and much that some girl came in the stall next to me, she did her business and washed her hands and I was STILL peeing.......yeah, that ought to make ya feel good....LOL
I just used the hand dryer at work and thought of you. :)
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